Your profile tells a story

Dating profile picture tips

The better you are at attracting the right people, the more the wrong ones won't be attracted to you. If you love your job, say so. Your profile should start out by describing your most prominent and positive character traits. Your profile tells a story. If one of your defining values is loyalty, show what that looks like in your life.

Of course you need compelling photos, but those who are looking for a real relationship will look beyond a pretty face to find out what you are about. Be sure to also include what you care about.

Your story is dictating who is attracted to you, so make sure you are grabbing the attention of the right people. If you focus on characteristics you risk sounding superficial, rigid, or overly picky. When you focus on character, you are being specific as to your values, which will resonate with like-minded people.

If they hate sailing, hate the water and hate sailors, they're already gone. Don't use the crutch of describing your job and moving on. The right people are going to think that's awesome. You might be sarcastic, and that might be what people who know you love about you. Lastly, be honest about what you are seeking.

You are trying to attract the right people to you, and to do that you need to be specific. When you are writing about who you are and how your live your life, be sure to show the reader what that looks like in action. For example, many people say in their profiles they like to travel. Give a snapshot of who you are, how you live your life and the relationship you are seeking.

It is more effective to focus on attracting the right people than repelling the wrong ones. Leave out the negative and the snarky. Who you want to meet - the character, not the characteristics.

If you're at a loss, ask your friends for help describing you. Francesca is a professional dating coach and matchmaker. The thoughtfulness and care you put into your profile will show and be appreciated by others. Not only do you come across as negative, but you also give the impression that you are the very thing you claim not to want. It amazes me how many people use their precious profile real estate to talk about what they don't want or about their cynicism, bitterness or pessimism.

If they hate

Plenty of people will be forgiving of typos, but don't risk turning off someone just because you didn't use spellcheck. Since we're talking about writing a profile, I have to mention spelling and grammar. There is a lot of bad spelling and grammar out there. Another common pitfall is sarcasm in the profile. Decide the story you want to tell.

Don't use the crutch of

It might tell the story of an athletic, ambitious world traveler, or a geeky, sincere introvert. If you aren't able to be objective about your profile, ask someone you trust to read it for you. Check your spelling and grammar. Imagine that your ideal partner is going to read your profile. Or it could tell the story of a bitter, demanding perfectionist.